Lost and Out of Time
Mar. 19th, 2019 07:43 pm![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
dime_lioraTitle: Lost and Out of Time
Author: dimeliora
Fandom: SPN RPF
Wordcount: 3,459
Rating: NC-17
Characters: Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki
Pairing(s): J2
Prompt(s): This timestamp was requested a very long time ago by![[livejournal.com profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/external/lj-userinfo.gif)
deserthighway. I am incredibly grateful at the patience and consideration show on how badly RL slowed down the creation of this, and I hope that it's worth it!
Summary: A timestamp to "The Broken Heart is Blind", which revisits Jensen and Jared in the aftermath of the original story.
Master post
Previous part
Jensen wakes up on high alert.
Something is wrong.
Something is desperately wrong.
He looks around the room and sees everything in its place. Jared’s framed movie posters, the pictures of both of their respective families, the newspaper article about how he took down Pileggi’s operation.
But there’s no Jared. And Jensen’s heart rate triples and he stands up and crosses the carpet as quietly as he possibly can.
It was coming. For the last four months it’s been coming and Jensen knew it in the back of his mind. He saw the way Jared looked at him, slyly out of the corner of his eyes, and all the signs of a building secret. A pending surprise.
And sure enough, before coffee is had, before he gets to put on a shirt, before he can have even one second of peaceful enjoyment in the already too warm Texas March weather the attack comes.
“SURPRISE!”
Jensen is hit in the face by no less than eight handfuls of glitter confetti. And just as he is wiping it away Chad steps up behind Jensen’s godfather and tosses an entire bucket of the shit back into Jensen’s face.
Birthdays are the worst.
Chad and Sandy are huddled around Jared, talking quietly and laughing while Jensen grills steak. Jeff is standing close by, sipping a beer and studying him.
“You know I woulda cooked those.”
“Yeah, wrong.”
Jeff snorts at that, takes another sip of the beer, and then looks around.
“You guys decided to buy?”
Jensen takes a drink from his own beer before he answers.
“Yeah. We been renting for a year so it seemed the best option.”
The two of them have never been big on chatting. Their relationship was built on mutual loss and need. It was understood.
“Proud of you.”
Jensen almost drops his beer. It’s like everyone around him has gained the ability to read his mind since he stopped living a lie and now they all want to do the opposite of what he thinks.
“For buying a house?”
“For letting yourself be happy. And for snagging a good guy and not fucking it up.”
“That, is entirely on Jared. I tried my hardest to fuck it up and he just wouldn’t let me.”
Jeff laughs then, his eyes drifting towards his wife and then back to Jensen again.
“Yeah, I get that. But now there’s really just one thing left.”
Icarus begins to chew angrily on Jensen’s ankle, and he takes a moment to throw the little dog a piece of meat just to save his own hide.
“I got plans.”
Jeff smiles, big and broad.
“Proud of you.”
And Jensen isn’t ashamed of the flush he knows is on his face or the smile that takes over.
When he woke up the day after Jared told him not to go, scrunched into the hospital bed and suffering from more aches and pains than he had time to consider, Jensen wasn’t sure if it was all real. He’d gotten his revenge, he’d gotten his man, and now he got to live.
It had to be fake.
More importantly, how long would it take for Jared to figure out what a catastrophic mistake he had made and just tell Jensen to fuck off?
It didn’t happen in the first week, while Jared was going through every type of therapy the hospital could give him, and Jensen was being forced to talk to the department shrink to be cleared for duty.
It didn’t happen a month later when Jared held out two plane tickets to Texas with no further comment, and Jensen said he would start packing.
And it didn’t happen at five months when Jensen finally started to work on the force in Houston and Jared started his own position with a new vet’s office. That was actually when Jensen most suspected something would be coming honestly, because that was when it made the most sense for everything to break all the way down. When Jared would have a clear way out and know that Jensen was stable enough to survive it. But Jared didn’t leave.
Every day that Jared simply loved him, no earned guilt and no pushing for anything more than them being together, was a gift that Jensen couldn’t begin to thank Jared for. So yeah, there was one more step, and Jensen had already planned for it.
And Jared had been good enough, once again, to give him exactly what he needed to do what he wanted and needed. Jensen figured he should give Jared something for that kind of helpfulness.
Jeff carries the last of the steaks over, and Jensen hooks both their beers and grabs the bowl of potatoes. Chad reluctantly lets Jensen get settled next to his boyfriend.
“Did you make me tasty mea- I’m looking forward to this.”
Jared’s face isn’t red, but he doesn’t make eye contact with his laughing parents or siblings.
“I’m glad, Darling.”
The Padaleckis make cooing noises, Jared’s face finally goes into a bright red Jensen loves to see, and Jeff grins while Chad and Sandy loudly gag. But Sandy is smiling a little bit, and Jensen takes that as a step towards forgiveness. A thing he needs considering what he’s about to do with their best friend.
Everyone digs in, and Jensen waits until Jared is deep into his steak to clear his throat and deal with everyone looking his way.
“Jared. You’ve been really good to me.”
His boyfriend looks up, later than everyone else, his cheeks swollen with steak and potato. Jared starts chewing, smart enough to know he’ll need to talk but obviously unsure how long he has before that happens.
And Jensen uses that as an excuse to get up and stand over Jared. Now his boyfriend has stuffed cheeks and is squinting into the sun.
Jensen is fucking this up bad, but now he can’t stop.
“You’ve been really good to me even though I’ve been pretty terrible as a boyfriend and a partner.”
Jared squeaks through his mouthful, and Chad mutters “hear, hear”.
“And if it wasn’t for you I’d be fucking deader than a doornail. Sorry, Mrs. Padalecki.”
His boyfriend’s mother shakes her head, her hand on her chest, and Jensen has to fight not to grin because she’s got where he’s going and she seems really happy about it. That buoys him a little. Jared on the other hand has taken advantage of what appears to be a really long speech to stuff a little more steak into his mouth.
So Jensen, who is not really a good man, kneels down and takes Jared’s free hand. His boyfriend’s eyes bug out, almost as much as his cheeks.
“Every day I think you’re gonna get smarter than you already are and take off. And every day you don’t. So, I was wondering, since I can’t knock you up to get you stuck with me, can I ask you to marry me so you’re too guilty to ever find somebody worth you?”
Jared is practically choking on his mouthful. He starts talking, hits Jensen with a piece of steak, turns redder than a fire engine, and then wraps his arms around Jensen while chewing noisily and furiously. A few moments later Jared chokes out, “Yes!”
Jensen waits until he’s sure Jared has finished swallowing to pick his big man up and spin him.
That night, after everyone has left and only Chad didn’t join in the congratulations, they’re wrapped around each other in bed. Jared is very busy trying to smother Jensen with kisses.
Jensen isn’t exactly fighting for his life.
It occurs to him, while Jared is working on the knot for his pajama pants, that he forgot a step. He gives Jared a gentle push to disengage and Jared takes the hint. But pouts. A lot.
“Jensen. Jensen we’re engaged. You’re required to just…like ravish the shit out of me.”
He feels his eyebrow raise into his hairline as he turns and starts to dig in the nightstand.
“Ravish the shit out of you? That’s a really weird combination of like…romance terms and porn.”
“I am very romantic. And very horny.”
“I can see that. Hold on I’m looking for something.”
While Jensen is digging Jared stays busy. He gets Jensen’s pants undone and mostly off, and his hand around Jensen’s cock.
His man is talented and swift. And usually he would appreciate that but Jared is jerking him off with his left hand.
“Jay. Jay, Darling, you gotta take your hand off.”
Jared leans forward, locking lips with him again, tongue sliding along for entrance and Jensen giving it. They go at it for a bit, Jared so busy pulling on his dick and licking out his mouth he seems totally unaware that Jensen is holding something. He has to break it off again, and that’s unfortunate and hard.
Ba dum tss.
“Jay. Hold out your left hand.”
Jared waggles his eyebrows and complies, mouth curled into a bright and dirty smile, and then his eyes go huge and well up when he sees the Death Star engagement ring Jensen found on the internet. Jensen takes his time, sliding it along one long and elegant finger and resting it at the base before stroking the skin there.
“That’s no moon.”
“No Jay, it’s an engagement ring.”
Jared gives him a look, something between sass and love that Jensen knows is unique to his man.
“Did you want me to say no?”
“Did you want me to take this ring back?”
And just like that Jared moves at the speed of light, snatching his hand back and cuddling it against himself before hissing like a big cat. Jensen can’t help but laugh.
“Yes.”
“Yes, you want me to take the ring back?”
“Yes, I’ll marry you. But only because it’s the only way I can keep the ring. Because you are terrible. Just, the worst.”
Jensen swallows, takes a breath, and then cups Jared’s face. The tone should stay light, they need light together, at least this once. But instead Jensen is overwhelmed with the sheer importance of the moment and the blessing of having Jared say yes.
And Jared is nice enough to hold still and watch as Jensen rubs one thumb along his cheekbone. Jared is nice enough to not say out loud why he has to reach up and brush Jensen’s cheeks.
“Thank you, Jay.”
His fiancé, his fiancé, smiles big and bright.
“Jen?”
“Yeah?”
“You gotta stop. I’m not something you don’t deserve. I’m not better than you. We had a rough time, we both made mistakes. You more than me, yeah, but both. But that’s over and it’s us together right now strong and in love. And we can’t be partners if you think you’re beneath me. Ok?”
He bites his lip, waits a second, and then leans forward to kiss Jared. Now they’re both crying. Which is just fine.
“You want me to go crazy cowboy on you now?”
“Can I be the wilting Southern flower?”
“Darling, you can be whatever you want.”
Jared makes a thrilled trill, throws his big hand over his face and immediately screams, “Fuck!”
He’s poked himself in the eye with the Death Star.
Several hours, two separate orgasms, and one ice pack later Jensen is helping Jared text every single one of his friends and family. Jared is playing at being too weak with the pain to look at his phone.
When Jensen pointed out that Jared was more than capable of posing with the ring, or riding Jensen like a roller coaster, Jared’s main point of contention was that he should have picked mechanical bull. Sometimes, Jensen thinks that Jared’s cowboy kink is a bit too much.
Jared’s head is resting on his thigh as he dictates every text out to Jensen. Each one is slightly different. Jared seems unconcerned about Jensen reading the responses. So far everyone is excited. Except for Chad.
Neither of them are super surprised by that part.
After the texts are done Jared settles in more comfortably, draped over Jensen and making him wish he’d set the air conditioner on a higher setting. The dogs haven’t made a sound, which Jensen wants to take as a blessing but he’s actually highly suspicious about.
“What kind of ceremony do you want?”
“A successful one.”
Jared makes a noise, something between annoyance and amusement.
“Ok smartass, but like, big one, small one, family and friends, destination? What?”
“You’ve got more family and friends than me so that part is kinda on you. But. I dunno if it’d be your thing but my parents got married in this park and I-“
“Holy fuck yes. Please. Yes. Let’s get married at your parents’ park.”
“That was quick.”
Jared’s eyes are dreamy. Hopeful. Jensen leans in to kiss him and takes his time before pulling back to hear the answer.
“I want to make them a part of it too. They made you, they should be involved.”
He has to swallow at that. There were a lot of possibilities, but Jensen didn’t see that one coming.
“Thank you, Jared.”
“Thank you.”
Jensen runs his fingers through Jared’s hair, soft and slow to help soothe Jared to sleep. Jared is not biting the bait like he usually does in these moments.
“You know, I was thinking about a conversation we had a really long time ago.”
“Jared-“
“About me haunting you.”
“Oh god, Jared no, please not again.”
“And I think maybe I’ll just not die and we won’t test the haunting thing.”
Jensen lets out a relieved sigh.
“Or I’ll swear to come back as a zombie and follow you around eating the brains of any guy foolish enough to come near you.”
“There’s my fucking lunatic.”
The wedding planning is going better than he could have expected. That being said, there is one thing that Jensen needs to fix before the wedding. He’d hoped it could be ignored, but it just can’t.
The phone rings twice, and then Chad picks up.
“What do you want?”
“Jared is really excited.”
There’s a pause, just a small one, before Chad fires back.
“Yeah well, he’s a bad judge of character.”
Jensen bites back his initial response which includes Chad in Jared’s character blindness.
“That may be true, but you’re his best friend and you’re not happy for him.”
“He wouldn’t complain to you about that.”
“Yeah, he didn’t. But there’s a lot of red flags that he wants you to be excited for him and you’re not. And I need to talk to you about that.”
“Do we gotta?”
“Yeah, unfortunately. I’m sorry.”
He hears Chad suck his teeth before responding.
“Apologizing to the wrong guy.”
“No, I’m not. Because I’ve apologized to Jared but not to you. And I hurt your best friend. I hurt him very badly. That was my fault. You couldn’t understand why I did it, or why I wouldn’t see what I was doing and that hurt you. And I’ve apologized to him and I’ve explained myself, but I haven’t apologized to you. So, I’m sorry. And you can hate me till I die, but Jared wants to ask you to be his best man and he hasn’t yet. Because he thinks that you’re not happy about it.”
That noise again, and then Chad is vaguely acerbic.
“Well ok Freud, I accept your apology.”
“Thank you? Was Sigmund Freud famous for apologizing and I didn’t know about it?”
“No, because you’re trying to fucking head shrink me.”
“I think I’m head shrinking Jared.”
Chad hangs up, and Jensen feels like he either just won that, or fucked it up worse.
“So.” Jared is stretched out in the hot tub, ass pressed against Jensen’s crotch and long legs floating in the bubbling hot water. “Chad’s my best man.”
Jensen lays his hand flat on his fiancée’s belly and looks up at the stars.
“That’s unfortunate.”
Laughter, and a little ass wiggle that takes all of Jensen’s sass out of him.
“And he said you called him because you’re a moron.”
“That’s not an accurate description of my reasoning but I guess I’ll take it. Nicer than I would’ve thought he’d be.”
“Not a quote.”
“Makes more sense now.”
Jared wriggles again, and Jensen takes a sharp breath and then pulls Jared in a little closer.
“You’re gonna ruin our quiet, sweet hot tub wedding planning.”
“I don’t think this is ruining.”
Jensen hums, and Jared turns around to straddle his lap.
“That was so sweet of you. I know you guys don’t get along.”
He shrugs, looking directly at Jared’s left nipple with a certain hunger that only comes around when Jared is distracting him like this. Not that he doesn’t always love Jared’s nipples.
“Well, listen, I’m just doing the thing that seems right.”
“You know what else- oh Jen- seems right?”
“Mmmph?” His mouth is full, and he’s not emptying it.
“The doggies being ring bearers.”
Jensen cuts his eyes to the left, where Harley is running in circles, Sadie is sleeping, and Icarus is chewing…a shoe. An expensive one.
This conversation will be had later.
The sun is shining bright, birds are chirping, and they are standing in the same gazebo his parents once promised themselves to each other in. He feels them there, watching. Jensen stands in front of their family and friends, Jared across from him in a tux that makes Jensen’s mouth water and his eyes tear up.
It’s the tailoring. Really.
Jared has gone already, made a speech that left several people crying including Chad. And Jensen literally doesn’t want to follow that act, but he knows that he has to because otherwise they don’t get to do the kiss.
And he really wants to do the kiss.
He takes the deepest of breaths, and then pulls out the cards. He worked hard on this. The majority of this crowd only knows bits and pieces of their story, and Jensen hopes he hasn’t put too much in here.
“Jared, when I met you I was different. Focused on all the wrongs things. I was filled with grief and anger over the loss of my parents, angry at the world. And somehow all you saw was the good in me that my parents instilled. All you saw was what I wanted to matter instead of what did. You made that matter to me again. You made me love again, even though I was too angry. And too scared. So, I’m not super well-spoken or well-read, but I found this on the internet and it made me think of you. Love starts as a feeling, But to continue is a choice; And I find myself choosing you, More and more every day. Like two flowers, Which begin from separate roots, But entangle and grow as one, We are stronger together. You make me feel, Like I deserve the world, Even though I have nothing to give, But love and laughter. When I look into your eyes, It’s easy to forget, What is was like, To stare into life’s darkness. When I listen to your laugh, It’s so easy to forget, Every pessimistic word I ever said, About love and romance.” He looks up to see Jared weeping, Chad sticking a handkerchief in Jared’s hand and Sandy rubbing his back. “I am grateful, I am overwhelmed, and I will never fail you again.”
And then finally, they kiss. Several minutes of ceremony later they kiss again, faces red and both sets of eyes wet. The officiant keeps the premature jokes to a minimum.
“You have failed me Jensen.”
“I said, I’M SORRY.”
“You JUST promised not to fail me.”
“I. AM. SORRY.”
Jared sniffs once, rubs underneath his dry eyes dramatically, and then adjusts his undone tie before stepping back outside the door.
“Try again.”
He doesn’t let his mouth purse. Doesn’t let himself get sarcastic. It is their wedding night.
“Ok, Darling.”
He sweeps his arms under Jared’s legs and back, pulls him in close, and then takes the world’s tiniest side steps to keep Jared’s head clear from the doorframe this time.
“And say something sweet when we get inside.” Jared’s arms loop around his neck, skin radiating heat through the tux. “Something really sweet.”
Jensen gets him totally clear of the doorframe and in sight of the bed, before he tosses Jared onto the covers and then hooks his fingers in his tie to pull it loose.
“I’m gonna use this to blindfold you, yours to tie your hands, and then lick you out until you can’t stand.”
Jared, does not have a witty comeback.
He knows how to be sweet.
A/N: In case you're interested, here's the ring, and the title of the poem, and the link back to the masterpost:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/592525157/star-wars-engagement-ring-star-wars?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=geek+engagement+ring&ref=sr_gallery-1-35&frs=1
“To Love is to Live” Bending the Universe Justin Wetch
Masterpost
Author: dimeliora
Fandom: SPN RPF
Wordcount: 3,459
Rating: NC-17
Characters: Jensen Ackles, Jared Padalecki
Pairing(s): J2
Prompt(s): This timestamp was requested a very long time ago by
deserthighway. I am incredibly grateful at the patience and consideration show on how badly RL slowed down the creation of this, and I hope that it's worth it!Summary: A timestamp to "The Broken Heart is Blind", which revisits Jensen and Jared in the aftermath of the original story.
Master post
Previous part
Jensen wakes up on high alert.
Something is wrong.
Something is desperately wrong.
He looks around the room and sees everything in its place. Jared’s framed movie posters, the pictures of both of their respective families, the newspaper article about how he took down Pileggi’s operation.
But there’s no Jared. And Jensen’s heart rate triples and he stands up and crosses the carpet as quietly as he possibly can.
It was coming. For the last four months it’s been coming and Jensen knew it in the back of his mind. He saw the way Jared looked at him, slyly out of the corner of his eyes, and all the signs of a building secret. A pending surprise.
And sure enough, before coffee is had, before he gets to put on a shirt, before he can have even one second of peaceful enjoyment in the already too warm Texas March weather the attack comes.
“SURPRISE!”
Jensen is hit in the face by no less than eight handfuls of glitter confetti. And just as he is wiping it away Chad steps up behind Jensen’s godfather and tosses an entire bucket of the shit back into Jensen’s face.
Birthdays are the worst.
Chad and Sandy are huddled around Jared, talking quietly and laughing while Jensen grills steak. Jeff is standing close by, sipping a beer and studying him.
“You know I woulda cooked those.”
“Yeah, wrong.”
Jeff snorts at that, takes another sip of the beer, and then looks around.
“You guys decided to buy?”
Jensen takes a drink from his own beer before he answers.
“Yeah. We been renting for a year so it seemed the best option.”
The two of them have never been big on chatting. Their relationship was built on mutual loss and need. It was understood.
“Proud of you.”
Jensen almost drops his beer. It’s like everyone around him has gained the ability to read his mind since he stopped living a lie and now they all want to do the opposite of what he thinks.
“For buying a house?”
“For letting yourself be happy. And for snagging a good guy and not fucking it up.”
“That, is entirely on Jared. I tried my hardest to fuck it up and he just wouldn’t let me.”
Jeff laughs then, his eyes drifting towards his wife and then back to Jensen again.
“Yeah, I get that. But now there’s really just one thing left.”
Icarus begins to chew angrily on Jensen’s ankle, and he takes a moment to throw the little dog a piece of meat just to save his own hide.
“I got plans.”
Jeff smiles, big and broad.
“Proud of you.”
And Jensen isn’t ashamed of the flush he knows is on his face or the smile that takes over.
When he woke up the day after Jared told him not to go, scrunched into the hospital bed and suffering from more aches and pains than he had time to consider, Jensen wasn’t sure if it was all real. He’d gotten his revenge, he’d gotten his man, and now he got to live.
It had to be fake.
More importantly, how long would it take for Jared to figure out what a catastrophic mistake he had made and just tell Jensen to fuck off?
It didn’t happen in the first week, while Jared was going through every type of therapy the hospital could give him, and Jensen was being forced to talk to the department shrink to be cleared for duty.
It didn’t happen a month later when Jared held out two plane tickets to Texas with no further comment, and Jensen said he would start packing.
And it didn’t happen at five months when Jensen finally started to work on the force in Houston and Jared started his own position with a new vet’s office. That was actually when Jensen most suspected something would be coming honestly, because that was when it made the most sense for everything to break all the way down. When Jared would have a clear way out and know that Jensen was stable enough to survive it. But Jared didn’t leave.
Every day that Jared simply loved him, no earned guilt and no pushing for anything more than them being together, was a gift that Jensen couldn’t begin to thank Jared for. So yeah, there was one more step, and Jensen had already planned for it.
And Jared had been good enough, once again, to give him exactly what he needed to do what he wanted and needed. Jensen figured he should give Jared something for that kind of helpfulness.
Jeff carries the last of the steaks over, and Jensen hooks both their beers and grabs the bowl of potatoes. Chad reluctantly lets Jensen get settled next to his boyfriend.
“Did you make me tasty mea- I’m looking forward to this.”
Jared’s face isn’t red, but he doesn’t make eye contact with his laughing parents or siblings.
“I’m glad, Darling.”
The Padaleckis make cooing noises, Jared’s face finally goes into a bright red Jensen loves to see, and Jeff grins while Chad and Sandy loudly gag. But Sandy is smiling a little bit, and Jensen takes that as a step towards forgiveness. A thing he needs considering what he’s about to do with their best friend.
Everyone digs in, and Jensen waits until Jared is deep into his steak to clear his throat and deal with everyone looking his way.
“Jared. You’ve been really good to me.”
His boyfriend looks up, later than everyone else, his cheeks swollen with steak and potato. Jared starts chewing, smart enough to know he’ll need to talk but obviously unsure how long he has before that happens.
And Jensen uses that as an excuse to get up and stand over Jared. Now his boyfriend has stuffed cheeks and is squinting into the sun.
Jensen is fucking this up bad, but now he can’t stop.
“You’ve been really good to me even though I’ve been pretty terrible as a boyfriend and a partner.”
Jared squeaks through his mouthful, and Chad mutters “hear, hear”.
“And if it wasn’t for you I’d be fucking deader than a doornail. Sorry, Mrs. Padalecki.”
His boyfriend’s mother shakes her head, her hand on her chest, and Jensen has to fight not to grin because she’s got where he’s going and she seems really happy about it. That buoys him a little. Jared on the other hand has taken advantage of what appears to be a really long speech to stuff a little more steak into his mouth.
So Jensen, who is not really a good man, kneels down and takes Jared’s free hand. His boyfriend’s eyes bug out, almost as much as his cheeks.
“Every day I think you’re gonna get smarter than you already are and take off. And every day you don’t. So, I was wondering, since I can’t knock you up to get you stuck with me, can I ask you to marry me so you’re too guilty to ever find somebody worth you?”
Jared is practically choking on his mouthful. He starts talking, hits Jensen with a piece of steak, turns redder than a fire engine, and then wraps his arms around Jensen while chewing noisily and furiously. A few moments later Jared chokes out, “Yes!”
Jensen waits until he’s sure Jared has finished swallowing to pick his big man up and spin him.
That night, after everyone has left and only Chad didn’t join in the congratulations, they’re wrapped around each other in bed. Jared is very busy trying to smother Jensen with kisses.
Jensen isn’t exactly fighting for his life.
It occurs to him, while Jared is working on the knot for his pajama pants, that he forgot a step. He gives Jared a gentle push to disengage and Jared takes the hint. But pouts. A lot.
“Jensen. Jensen we’re engaged. You’re required to just…like ravish the shit out of me.”
He feels his eyebrow raise into his hairline as he turns and starts to dig in the nightstand.
“Ravish the shit out of you? That’s a really weird combination of like…romance terms and porn.”
“I am very romantic. And very horny.”
“I can see that. Hold on I’m looking for something.”
While Jensen is digging Jared stays busy. He gets Jensen’s pants undone and mostly off, and his hand around Jensen’s cock.
His man is talented and swift. And usually he would appreciate that but Jared is jerking him off with his left hand.
“Jay. Jay, Darling, you gotta take your hand off.”
Jared leans forward, locking lips with him again, tongue sliding along for entrance and Jensen giving it. They go at it for a bit, Jared so busy pulling on his dick and licking out his mouth he seems totally unaware that Jensen is holding something. He has to break it off again, and that’s unfortunate and hard.
Ba dum tss.
“Jay. Hold out your left hand.”
Jared waggles his eyebrows and complies, mouth curled into a bright and dirty smile, and then his eyes go huge and well up when he sees the Death Star engagement ring Jensen found on the internet. Jensen takes his time, sliding it along one long and elegant finger and resting it at the base before stroking the skin there.
“That’s no moon.”
“No Jay, it’s an engagement ring.”
Jared gives him a look, something between sass and love that Jensen knows is unique to his man.
“Did you want me to say no?”
“Did you want me to take this ring back?”
And just like that Jared moves at the speed of light, snatching his hand back and cuddling it against himself before hissing like a big cat. Jensen can’t help but laugh.
“Yes.”
“Yes, you want me to take the ring back?”
“Yes, I’ll marry you. But only because it’s the only way I can keep the ring. Because you are terrible. Just, the worst.”
Jensen swallows, takes a breath, and then cups Jared’s face. The tone should stay light, they need light together, at least this once. But instead Jensen is overwhelmed with the sheer importance of the moment and the blessing of having Jared say yes.
And Jared is nice enough to hold still and watch as Jensen rubs one thumb along his cheekbone. Jared is nice enough to not say out loud why he has to reach up and brush Jensen’s cheeks.
“Thank you, Jay.”
His fiancé, his fiancé, smiles big and bright.
“Jen?”
“Yeah?”
“You gotta stop. I’m not something you don’t deserve. I’m not better than you. We had a rough time, we both made mistakes. You more than me, yeah, but both. But that’s over and it’s us together right now strong and in love. And we can’t be partners if you think you’re beneath me. Ok?”
He bites his lip, waits a second, and then leans forward to kiss Jared. Now they’re both crying. Which is just fine.
“You want me to go crazy cowboy on you now?”
“Can I be the wilting Southern flower?”
“Darling, you can be whatever you want.”
Jared makes a thrilled trill, throws his big hand over his face and immediately screams, “Fuck!”
He’s poked himself in the eye with the Death Star.
Several hours, two separate orgasms, and one ice pack later Jensen is helping Jared text every single one of his friends and family. Jared is playing at being too weak with the pain to look at his phone.
When Jensen pointed out that Jared was more than capable of posing with the ring, or riding Jensen like a roller coaster, Jared’s main point of contention was that he should have picked mechanical bull. Sometimes, Jensen thinks that Jared’s cowboy kink is a bit too much.
Jared’s head is resting on his thigh as he dictates every text out to Jensen. Each one is slightly different. Jared seems unconcerned about Jensen reading the responses. So far everyone is excited. Except for Chad.
Neither of them are super surprised by that part.
After the texts are done Jared settles in more comfortably, draped over Jensen and making him wish he’d set the air conditioner on a higher setting. The dogs haven’t made a sound, which Jensen wants to take as a blessing but he’s actually highly suspicious about.
“What kind of ceremony do you want?”
“A successful one.”
Jared makes a noise, something between annoyance and amusement.
“Ok smartass, but like, big one, small one, family and friends, destination? What?”
“You’ve got more family and friends than me so that part is kinda on you. But. I dunno if it’d be your thing but my parents got married in this park and I-“
“Holy fuck yes. Please. Yes. Let’s get married at your parents’ park.”
“That was quick.”
Jared’s eyes are dreamy. Hopeful. Jensen leans in to kiss him and takes his time before pulling back to hear the answer.
“I want to make them a part of it too. They made you, they should be involved.”
He has to swallow at that. There were a lot of possibilities, but Jensen didn’t see that one coming.
“Thank you, Jared.”
“Thank you.”
Jensen runs his fingers through Jared’s hair, soft and slow to help soothe Jared to sleep. Jared is not biting the bait like he usually does in these moments.
“You know, I was thinking about a conversation we had a really long time ago.”
“Jared-“
“About me haunting you.”
“Oh god, Jared no, please not again.”
“And I think maybe I’ll just not die and we won’t test the haunting thing.”
Jensen lets out a relieved sigh.
“Or I’ll swear to come back as a zombie and follow you around eating the brains of any guy foolish enough to come near you.”
“There’s my fucking lunatic.”
The wedding planning is going better than he could have expected. That being said, there is one thing that Jensen needs to fix before the wedding. He’d hoped it could be ignored, but it just can’t.
The phone rings twice, and then Chad picks up.
“What do you want?”
“Jared is really excited.”
There’s a pause, just a small one, before Chad fires back.
“Yeah well, he’s a bad judge of character.”
Jensen bites back his initial response which includes Chad in Jared’s character blindness.
“That may be true, but you’re his best friend and you’re not happy for him.”
“He wouldn’t complain to you about that.”
“Yeah, he didn’t. But there’s a lot of red flags that he wants you to be excited for him and you’re not. And I need to talk to you about that.”
“Do we gotta?”
“Yeah, unfortunately. I’m sorry.”
He hears Chad suck his teeth before responding.
“Apologizing to the wrong guy.”
“No, I’m not. Because I’ve apologized to Jared but not to you. And I hurt your best friend. I hurt him very badly. That was my fault. You couldn’t understand why I did it, or why I wouldn’t see what I was doing and that hurt you. And I’ve apologized to him and I’ve explained myself, but I haven’t apologized to you. So, I’m sorry. And you can hate me till I die, but Jared wants to ask you to be his best man and he hasn’t yet. Because he thinks that you’re not happy about it.”
That noise again, and then Chad is vaguely acerbic.
“Well ok Freud, I accept your apology.”
“Thank you? Was Sigmund Freud famous for apologizing and I didn’t know about it?”
“No, because you’re trying to fucking head shrink me.”
“I think I’m head shrinking Jared.”
Chad hangs up, and Jensen feels like he either just won that, or fucked it up worse.
“So.” Jared is stretched out in the hot tub, ass pressed against Jensen’s crotch and long legs floating in the bubbling hot water. “Chad’s my best man.”
Jensen lays his hand flat on his fiancée’s belly and looks up at the stars.
“That’s unfortunate.”
Laughter, and a little ass wiggle that takes all of Jensen’s sass out of him.
“And he said you called him because you’re a moron.”
“That’s not an accurate description of my reasoning but I guess I’ll take it. Nicer than I would’ve thought he’d be.”
“Not a quote.”
“Makes more sense now.”
Jared wriggles again, and Jensen takes a sharp breath and then pulls Jared in a little closer.
“You’re gonna ruin our quiet, sweet hot tub wedding planning.”
“I don’t think this is ruining.”
Jensen hums, and Jared turns around to straddle his lap.
“That was so sweet of you. I know you guys don’t get along.”
He shrugs, looking directly at Jared’s left nipple with a certain hunger that only comes around when Jared is distracting him like this. Not that he doesn’t always love Jared’s nipples.
“Well, listen, I’m just doing the thing that seems right.”
“You know what else- oh Jen- seems right?”
“Mmmph?” His mouth is full, and he’s not emptying it.
“The doggies being ring bearers.”
Jensen cuts his eyes to the left, where Harley is running in circles, Sadie is sleeping, and Icarus is chewing…a shoe. An expensive one.
This conversation will be had later.
The sun is shining bright, birds are chirping, and they are standing in the same gazebo his parents once promised themselves to each other in. He feels them there, watching. Jensen stands in front of their family and friends, Jared across from him in a tux that makes Jensen’s mouth water and his eyes tear up.
It’s the tailoring. Really.
Jared has gone already, made a speech that left several people crying including Chad. And Jensen literally doesn’t want to follow that act, but he knows that he has to because otherwise they don’t get to do the kiss.
And he really wants to do the kiss.
He takes the deepest of breaths, and then pulls out the cards. He worked hard on this. The majority of this crowd only knows bits and pieces of their story, and Jensen hopes he hasn’t put too much in here.
“Jared, when I met you I was different. Focused on all the wrongs things. I was filled with grief and anger over the loss of my parents, angry at the world. And somehow all you saw was the good in me that my parents instilled. All you saw was what I wanted to matter instead of what did. You made that matter to me again. You made me love again, even though I was too angry. And too scared. So, I’m not super well-spoken or well-read, but I found this on the internet and it made me think of you. Love starts as a feeling, But to continue is a choice; And I find myself choosing you, More and more every day. Like two flowers, Which begin from separate roots, But entangle and grow as one, We are stronger together. You make me feel, Like I deserve the world, Even though I have nothing to give, But love and laughter. When I look into your eyes, It’s easy to forget, What is was like, To stare into life’s darkness. When I listen to your laugh, It’s so easy to forget, Every pessimistic word I ever said, About love and romance.” He looks up to see Jared weeping, Chad sticking a handkerchief in Jared’s hand and Sandy rubbing his back. “I am grateful, I am overwhelmed, and I will never fail you again.”
And then finally, they kiss. Several minutes of ceremony later they kiss again, faces red and both sets of eyes wet. The officiant keeps the premature jokes to a minimum.
“You have failed me Jensen.”
“I said, I’M SORRY.”
“You JUST promised not to fail me.”
“I. AM. SORRY.”
Jared sniffs once, rubs underneath his dry eyes dramatically, and then adjusts his undone tie before stepping back outside the door.
“Try again.”
He doesn’t let his mouth purse. Doesn’t let himself get sarcastic. It is their wedding night.
“Ok, Darling.”
He sweeps his arms under Jared’s legs and back, pulls him in close, and then takes the world’s tiniest side steps to keep Jared’s head clear from the doorframe this time.
“And say something sweet when we get inside.” Jared’s arms loop around his neck, skin radiating heat through the tux. “Something really sweet.”
Jensen gets him totally clear of the doorframe and in sight of the bed, before he tosses Jared onto the covers and then hooks his fingers in his tie to pull it loose.
“I’m gonna use this to blindfold you, yours to tie your hands, and then lick you out until you can’t stand.”
Jared, does not have a witty comeback.
He knows how to be sweet.
A/N: In case you're interested, here's the ring, and the title of the poem, and the link back to the masterpost:
https://www.etsy.com/listing/592525157/star-wars-engagement-ring-star-wars?ga_order=most_relevant&ga_search_type=all&ga_view_type=gallery&ga_search_query=geek+engagement+ring&ref=sr_gallery-1-35&frs=1
“To Love is to Live” Bending the Universe Justin Wetch
Masterpost
no subject
Date: 2019-03-22 08:30 pm (UTC)AND THE SWEET THING AT THE END. Praise be.
I have missed your wonderful words and stories, and this was such a great sequel to this amazing world!
no subject
Date: 2020-12-04 06:35 pm (UTC)